Who looks forward to the zombie apocalypse? The answer is, apparently, a lot of people. Maybe not really, but it’s clear that speculation on what we would or would not do in the event of a zombie apocalypse is a favorite topic of conversation. Some people plan to head for a forested area, and live off the land. Some people want to stay in an urban environment, for easy fortification and access to supplies. Some would head for sea. I, as previously stated, would head for somewhere really really cold. Ever see a zombie in a parka and mittens? Exactly. I refuse to consider the possibility of zombie penguins.
Some of my readers have shared the reasons they like discussing the zombie scenario. Most of them revolve around a desire to imagine a life without nonsense. It would be stripped to necessities, all etiquette, social climbing, and fashion sense rendered immediately useless. Ok, more useless.
I find freedom in imagining a world where all the material stuff, all the celebrity ridiculousness, and reality shows, and social standing, stops mattering, because mankind has managed to collectively focus on something more important. Not that I think a zombie apocalypse would be a good thing, but sometimes trying to pretend that the superficial is important gets to me. And so picturing myself with a composite bow picking off zombies, and debating escape plans in case of a zombie infestation makes life a little less mundane. Besides, it doesn’t hurt to be prepared…
So what do you need, in terms of know-how, for the zombie apocalypse? Someone who knows how to dress game. Someone who knows how to start a fire without matches. Edible plant knowledge. First aid. Battle strategy. Do you bring people to care for and teach children? What about books? Music? Do you set off with a gun, field rations, and water purification tablets? Do you try to save some of our history and culture? Strictly what’s needed to keep you alive, or bring food for the soul, too?
Here are a few more good sources of zombie survival info:
If you’re going to fight zombies, better know what your best weapons are, what to target, and how to fight singly and in groups, against one zombie or a horde. The Zombie Combat Manual, by Roger Ma, can help.
A good hunter can get inside the brain… or, something, of his prey. A zombie hunter must be able to think… erm, shamble mindlessly, like a zombie. Uh… I’m sure this is useful. There’s gotta be some zombies that are sneaky, right? Well, if you want to find the sneaky ones, check out Zombies: A Hunter’s Guide.
This book is called The Mammoth Book of Zombie Apocalypse. Why wouldn’t you read it?
Oh, and for humor:
Because humor is definitely needed for survival. And if Zombies Hate Stuff can’t make you laugh while the world’s ending, nothing will. FYI: zombies hate roving bands of ninjas. Who knew?
So. Given 5 days of warning, what do you do? Who do you bring, what do you take, where do you go?